Thursday, April 09, 2009

Swimming Lessons!

Apart from being the Subtitle of my favorite Shark Blog, "Swimming with Sharks" is also the title of this refreshingly unbiased article in the UK Telegraph.

What I found particularly rewarding was the fact that the majority of the Comments were well-informed and most importantly, very much pro-Shark. They even managed to largely ignore the token parasitic wanker and his usual garbage!
Just Great and maybe an indication that perceptions are starting to change!

And then, there's "How to swim with Sharks -- Voltaire Cousteau (Paris 1812)"
Highly informative! Or did you know that one of the principal rules is

It is a cardinal principle that if you are injured either by accident or by intent you must not bleed. Experience shows that bleeding prompts an even more aggressive attack and will often provoke the participation of Sharks which are uninvolved or, as noted above, are usually docile. Admittedly, it is difficult not to bleed when injured. Indeed, at first this may seem impossible. Diligent practice, however, will permit the experienced swimmer to sustain a serious laceration without bleeding and without even exhibiting any loss of composure. The hemostatic reflex can in part be conditioned, but there may be constitutional aspects as well. Those who cannot learn to control their bleeding should not attempt to swim with Sharks, for the peril is too great.

There you have it!
May this be at the origin of the (self-debunked - and I'll leave it at that) myth of controlling one's heartbeat?

I've found this somewhere here and having surfed around quite a bit, I still completely ignore what this is all about!
In the process, I've managed to discover the name of the author, miserably failed an intelligence test, polished up my knowledge of American history (it's not Genocide if there are no survivors), finally managed to understand the AIG debacle (Your two cows are now worth $2 each to guys who want to make dog food)
and the Stimulus Package,(Q. But isn't that stimulating the economy of China ? A. How's the weather up your way?), learned to argue effectively (Compare your opponent to Adolf Hitler), solved the chicken-or-egg riddle (there is not now, never has been, and never will be such a thing as a chicken or a chicken egg), learned to cook (When the chicken's ass blows the oven door open and the chicken flies across the room, it is done) and got reborn as the Village Ox.

Want to learn some more?
Start anywhere! And: Enjoy!

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